Giving Ourselves Permission to Heal in Layers

Growing up in a culture that praises quick fixes and instant results, many of us throughout our health journeys have experienced feeling frustrated and discouraged when we don’t heal at the pace we expect. We have doctors or other practitioners that are also doing their best to relieve you of your discomfort fast and in doing so, neglect to clarify that healing fully through the emotional, physical, and energetic bodies…simply takes time. While we may experience symptoms as showing up overnight, it took time for those responses to build in our bodies through chronic stress or trauma. Sustainable healing requires a gentle unraveling of our responses to experiences over time. 

So here’s the thing - somatic healing is a dance. We’re allowing the body (our nervous system) to take the lead while we get curious, observe, and hold space for all that comes up for us. While our fight or flight system is necessary and there to protect us, it is actually only when our system feels safe and connected that it can release or shift, promoting healing. Our body opens in layers of trust- a little at a time- and the more we try to rush or force it, the more we trigger the defenses that we are gently trying to soften. 

It really is not simply suggested that we take our time- it truly is essential, in that our bodies can only shift so much at once. The healing journey is often described as a spiral - returning more than once to a particular experience or theme- wherein each time we visit is with a little more awareness, a little more capacity, and a little more self-compassion. As we deepen our body’s ability to feel safe from the inside out over time, we are gifted the ability to live fully, freely, and embodied rather than continuing in survival mode. 

But here’s what I really hope you take from this - that we don’t have to wait until we’re “healed” to feel differently. Each small shift can open the door to feelings of relief, diminished discomfort, release. It can encourage a sense of hope within us as we begin to feel movement within ourselves and therefore in our external experiences. When we have moments of revisiting something we “thought we worked through already,” trust that you have worked through parts of it, and only because you did that can this new aspect show up. Remember that you may plant a seed months (sometimes years) before your body feels safe enough to fully process an emotion or memory, or before you’ve built up enough capacity to hold space for something to arise. Each beautifully significant shift serves to deepen and expand your capacity to hold space, your capacity to feel, and your ability to embrace all that comes to the surface. Know that most of us don’t do all of our healing from one experience, one practitioner, one healing modality. There is a natural ebb and flow to the healing journey, moving between periods of more intense work and periods of integration. 

So, give yourself permission to take your time, find joy in the dance, and be sure to celebrate the small victories that pave the way for transformative experiences.  

Sending you love and light,
-Melissa